You Never Really Leave the Playground

I only do the afternoon school run once a week. That’s because I work full time, but I do it one day a week to ease the mum guilt of working full time and spend some more time with my small humans.

Now I’ve only ever done one school and I’m presuming it’s like this at every school?! You get certain types of mums….

The cliquey mums – they arrive in their cars at the same time like its synchronised and they walk to the playground together where they stand in their groups. They probably all gave birth at the same time using nothing but the power of breathing for pain relief 🙄 You’d have to be a ballsy (or crazy) bitch to try and break into that group!

The late mums – the ones you always see walking in as you’re walking out with both your kids and you just know their child is used to being the last one standing with the teacher!

The gluten free mums – you know, the ones with all the healthy (gluten free) snacks for their hungry children, a perfect sleeping baby in the buggy, they’re well dressed and they don’t look remotely tired!

The lone mum – they aren’t part of a clique, they sensibly stopped at 1 or 2 children and both are at school so their life starts to resemble their own again! So they stand alone looking slightly smug and generally not caring about socialising in the playground because she can do that at cocktails later with her other grown up friends.

The mum who speaks to anyone – it’s generally against our English nature to be overly chatty and friendly, but there’s always one! If you don’t want to engage, avoid eye contact!

The dads (cheering) – there’s always a few dads in our playground! It’s great to see and they generally don’t fit into any of the other groups because they are usually oblivious and just wanna grab their kid and go home!

The mum and dad combo – now this one really baffles me. How can both parents be around to pick the kids up? I suppose it must be some self employment dream?!

The mum in Lycra – I mean, if you have time to exercise during the day, then I highly doubt that you needed to do it just before school finishes, so you definitely had time to get changed! We get it….you’re fit! 🙄

And finally, the rarest of all, The Working Mum!! – that’s me 🙂 and many other mothers who can’t afford to stay at home and have to work for a living. Rarely seen in the playground as they’re just too busy balancing a career with kids!

All mothers are great, and you never really know what’s going on behind closed doors, but hats off to the ones balancing it all and still managing to raise great humans!



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